When You’re the One Getting Married — and Anxious Attachment Shows Up

By Molly A. Summers

Wedding season is full of stories we love to tell — the flowers, the vows, the once-in-a-lifetime moment when two people say “yes” to each other forever. But behind all that beauty, there’s often a quieter story playing out in the heart of the bride or groom — especially when you carry an anxious attachment style.

Planning a wedding should feel like the happiest time of your life, and sometimes it truly does. But if you’ve ever found yourself wide awake at night, wondering what if they stop loving me, you’re not alone. Anxious attachment doesn’t vanish the moment someone says, I choose you. In fact, for many, a wedding can bring those fears right up to the surface.

Maybe you’ve caught yourself scanning for proof that this love will really last — reading into small silences, or replaying an argument that makes you doubt the future you’re building. Maybe you’ve thought, When we’re married, I won’t feel this scared anymore. But here’s the tender truth: no ring or promise can single-handedly heal the fear of not being enough. That healing starts inside you.

If this is your season to stand at the altar, let yourself be gentle with the parts of you that feel terrified to trust. It’s okay to ask for reassurance when you need it. It’s okay to name your worries instead of holding them alone. It’s okay to admit that you long to feel safe and secure — and that sometimes love still feels fragile, even when it’s real.

What if you could hold two truths at once — that you can be wildly loved and still afraid, committed and still learning, chosen and still growing into the safety you crave? That’s what it means to heal your attachment style in real life — not by pretending you’re fearless, but by letting love meet you where you really are.

If you’re planning your wedding and you feel that quiet panic beneath the excitement, you’re not broken. You’re human. And you’re allowed to learn how to feel secure without needing to prove you’re worthy of forever.

I work with many people just like you — people who want their love to feel calm and safe, not conditional or fragile. If you’d like gentle support on that journey, I’m here when you’re ready. Let’s talk about how coaching can help you stand in your own enoughness — so you don’t have to chase safety in someone else’s promise alone.

Written with care by Molly A. Summers, P.C.C. — Life Coach & Author
📌 coachingwithmollysummers.com

About Molly A. Summers, P.C.C.
Molly Summers is a professional certified life coach and author who helps people understand their attachment styles and build secure, steady love — in relationships, family, and life. After navigating her own journey through loss, unhealthy relationships, and big life transitions, Molly now guides others to calm anxious patterns, strengthen self-trust, and feel safe being fully themselves. All of her coaching is virtual and begins with a free, no-pressure conversation.